May 14, 2018

totally unfair

You know what really isn't fair at all?  When you make up a thing, like an amazingly good word that should be in common usage or a really fabulous product that you're going to go invent because you just came up with it yourself and it will revolutionize the world, and then you go look it up and find out that somebody else had that idea before you, even though you didn't steal it and you really did come up with it all by yourself.

(add your own caption -
as long as it's really mean)
I hate Virginia Foxx.  My hatred of her has its own synaesthesia colors (purple and brown).  I hate her with the fury of exploding stars.  And while all creatures must eventually die, I do not want her merely to quit this mortal world in her due hour.  When her time comes, I want her to have a massive, instantly fatal heart attack while standing beside a large water fountain inside an important congressional building, maybe near some elevators so there would be a lot of people nearby, and I want her to fall over dead into the water fountain in such a way that she stays upside-down and her skirt and slip fall up over her head, exposing the frayed elastic waistband of her Silvert's white cotton panties and her dreadfully veined legs.  Simply put, I want humiliation on a scale that would make it completely impossible for any journalist anywhere to write something respectful in her memory that could be taken seriously.

Something that would result in the video of "the Fountain Thing" being the first result in Google when searching for her name, a la Santorum.

Fuck you, #teamfoxx.

Anyway, I was expressing all of this earlier, and came up with "she'd put the bitch in obituary," and we laughed, and then I looked it up and it's already been said about five umptillion times.

I made up "snackrifice" and "sarcaustic" and "croggled", too, but some other asshole apparently got there first.

Update:  What is fair is to give due credit to an old friend for positing that Virginia Foxx is in fact the love child of Emperor Palpatine a/k/a Darth Sidious and Miss Prissy from the Foghorn Leghorn cartoons.  To wit:


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